What Has Google Been Telling People Behind My Back?

It was recently brought to my attention that 70 percent of Americans Google someone they are about to meet. If the statistics is right (which I don't dispute because I do that myself), then I should expect that a blind date's or a job interviewer's first impression about me would be based on what they see on Google rather than in our first encounter. Kind of unfair, given that Google's portrayal of me is not so flattering and not updated in real time to reflect my frequently-changing-and-improving self.

A search on "Yuyun Hartono" takes 0.18 seconds and comes back with tens of results, none of which is particularly great: my LinkedIn profile; my Facebook account; my newspaper articles; and my blog.

So what are these search results telling people about me?

I suppose.. that I have a job? Thanks to LinkedIn, I have a medium to tell the world that I am employed. But unfortunately due to its widespread use, I can't inflate my job descriptions as much as I'd like to since every one of my colleagues is on LinkedIn and can sense the grandiosity.

That I am normal? (because I have a facebook account)

That I am an untalented aspiring journalist? You bet. Every page of my search results is flooded with newspaper articles with blah headlines like Students Rally for Tibetan Freedom or Students Rally for Gay Marriage and underwhelming content that always starts with "University of Wisconsin [students/professor/staff/etc.] [activity] [goal] ... ". I like to think that my writing has improved since my college newspaper days, but evidence that I suck is forever there to stay (thanks, Google!).

That I am a chronic complainer? I guess so. The search result that pops up most after the newspaper articles is my blog, which contains nothing but kvetch, kvetch and more kvetch.

Now put yourself in the shoes of a blind date or a potential employer. After you read all those ugly articles and my super modest job descriptions, would you believe me if I told you that "my strong writing skills will allow me to make a significant contribution to your firm"? Would you not think that I'm faking my positive attitude on our date having read all these complaint-laden blog posts?

The fact that my name is "Yuyun Hartono" of course doesn't help. These job interviewers and blind dates can spot me easily and can be sure that the information they've been scouring for the past 15 minutes is indeed about me.

I wish I could do something about it, like knocking unwanted results, prohibiting people to Google me, or changing my name. But none of those is likely gonna happen. That said, all I can do for now is just complain, complain and continue to complain until I realize that seasons change, hair turns gray, and Google will still be bitching about me.